Single in the City: A girls' Defense against loneliness

Daryl Patrice Fortson

                  Candy hearts. Chocolates. Teddy bears. Puke.

Above is the typical single woman’s response to Valentine’s Day. We have no man, no boo, no cut-buddy, nothing to keep us warm but our down comforters. We ask ourselves, why should we feel compelled to love a holiday that – figuratively and, apparently, literally – doesn’t love us back? A holiday that is so obnoxiously commercial that Macy*s has a One-Day sale in its honor? A holiday that’s become less and less about love and more about “just getting some,” and then some?  Because it’s a good excuse to eat chocolate and look cute, dammit! My single ladies, lend me your hearts (and, of course, your ears). This year, Valentine’s Day will not be about “him”, or finding a “him,” but about you! Here are some pointers on how you can ward off the V-Day blues, restore and retain that “warm and fuzzy” feeling, and get the most out of your Valentine’s Day this year.

Believe it or not, there is an overabundance of people to love on, and most of them aren’t even of the male species. Make it a night on the town for you and your single girlfriends who are in need of some love (heavy emphasis on the “single” part of this statement, because nothing’s worse than a couple messing up your flow with their mushiness!). Spoil each other: buy funny cards and chocolate and wine and make a special dinner with just you all. Mind you, this dinner is not an opportunity to male-bash, nor is it a time to wallow in relationships gone wrong. No bitterness allowed! This is a holiday of love, after all. Set an atmosphere of positivity and self-love, and love on each other.

Now after a filling dinner like that, you’re going to need some way to work it off, right? Nothing is worse than food just sitting in your stomach all night. Solution: put your freakum dress on, ladies!! The best way to stick it to the holiday is to show the city how fine you are without a man! Put on your reddest dress, your highest pumps, nails done, hair done, everything did! Put some bend in your weave or some sheen in your ‘fro and GO! Exude confidence and shake a tail feather! But by all means, let that tall, dark brotha in at the bar buy you a drink. ;-)

Well, it’s 5 in the morning, you’ve partied your ass off, and it’s time for bed. We all know it’s cold outside this time of year, so as u slip into your naughty nightie that you bought for no one but yourself, turn the heat up on your thermostat, pop in your favorite movie, and settle in your down comforter with a box of chocolate from one of your best girlfriends. And hey, if you’re moved to do so, pop in a battery, too. Who says you can’t be bad all by yourself? Happy Valentine’s Day.